i lost it. screaming at her Mike. The spew got me, 6 months of batting the chit away with me saying, you don't know I don't know what will happen but we both have opinions and then going round the same old circle of her demands which bascially fook me over and therefore fook the kids over. Me I can handle, stitching my kids up seeing the dad no siree.
Mediation.
she wants house, but can't get a mortgage as she doesn't work. She is on mental money due to depression. I will not be able to buy a place without a deposit and I cannot have the current mortgage against me else I cannot borrow enough to use a public toilet. She doesn't give a flying fook.
She wants me to have them every other weekend and mon/wed til bedtime then take them home. I want mon/wed and one weekend night overnight and all following day.
first A hurts because back then we were supposed to be trying. trying my arse. She says it was over in her head, well do something not cheat on me and your kids....yes, sucked into the drama on that and next statement.....it was just the way it was.
She also insulted me, lied about me regularly during mediation. She also called me a bad father and I will not take that for nobody. my boys are my world. I've tried to be nice, compromising for them. She is nothing to me now, but she still has some control over my future and that p1sse5 me off more tha anything in this world.
I am faxing stuff to sols tomorrow then arranging to see him this week. I'm hoping the fact she cannot get a mortgage might mean we sell the house, we can have a clean break and start over with me not having anything to do with her.
Yes, anger and hate is bad, it's where i'm at today. Sure 48 hours will pass, I'll know my legal stuff and be ok again, but today was the worst day off my life (removing hindsight and the day I met her)
all that you feel is quite normal. I will tell you it will get better. You and I have benn getting prepared for what we will facen now, since we came here.
I'm living proof that you can do this Arthur..I thought my life ended after my 1st D..it did not..I thought I never wanted to go through another one but I have and I am/will survive quite well after this one is done..
Negativity works against you..try to be positive if you can..I know it's hard..Hey..You do know CBK is in the alternate right?? It may be good for you to talk to him now...he thought his world sucked months ago but has found things are not as bad as they seem now..
