Here are some more videos for you to watch. No, they arent naughty ones, just inspiration for mi amigo , you were there of rme now its time for me to return the favor. If you dont like 'em its ok. I wont get mad. Do you have an Ipod? I forgot? If not get one or something similair or borrow Daughters? and start taking those walks you are threatening to take. GOT IT? Kirk Franklin ~ Looking for you This one is one of my favorites....
And then this one just for laughs~ I think it is hilarious.... she does and says all that and he still says I DO!!!~ Katy Perry ~ Hot and cold
and then this one just for good measure.... Fleetwood Mac ~ Landslide I love this song , some days it makes me smile and others it makes me cry. Life is short and it slips thru your fingers and before you know it you wonder where it went. Here is wishing you many smiling days ahead and a life more full of happiness. You deserve it , we all do. God forgives us so why do we have such a hard time doing it? You are worthy Cinco. You are still in my prayers.... God bless you.... Get out there and grab life it is just out there waiting for you.... no ands ifs or buts...... Comprende? Love , ~Ava
Ava - I like that Hot and Cold video. lol Yeah I have an mp3 player loaded up with all my favs. I know what you mean about that Fleetwood Mac song. My favorite of their's is Songbird off Rumors.
I saw Duffy on Saturday Night Live a few weeks ago and fell in love with her music. She has this sort of Dusty Springfield vibe about her music although her voice is very different. Also reminds you of a Motown sound... very cool retro stuff. Bought the CD and really like the whole thing... yep it's loaded on the ipod already.
Ava, why is it we find it so hard to forgive ourselves? Sometimes I think people can be their own worst enemies sometimes. I'm feeling much better today though, been GALing my tale off. I'm so happy to have a friend like you mi cyber-amigo.
Well I have to get ready to go to the game tonight.... we're in the playoffs next week too!
What is it you want her to do - scream like a porn star eff me eff me,... harder, faster, harder - O god... more !!!! ? Has she ever been like that ?
I understand that you want her to want it, desire it. We all do. What I don't get is you are getting it. She is making the effort and it isn't good enough ? You want more effort ? You know she has a possible physical issue or something. She is embarrassed about it IMO. I am sorry - I don't want to be mean - but - yes - you might be asking for / expecting and pushing too much. My wife won't give me any sex and your complaining yours is giving it to you but isn't "into" it enough. Sorry pal, hard for me who is getting none with a wife who apparently doesn't give a [censored] about making her husband happy on any front to feel sorry for you.
Sorry - yes - I'm in a pissy mood. I was propositioned today and said no because I'm married and want us to make it life/marriage wise. But I could have had sex tonight. And I'm a man pig and want it and am angry my less attractive wife doesn't want it or care.
P.S. - I understand your frustration of your wifes radio talk show addiction. Mine spends virtually all her free time on her computer playing word games, ancestry.com, looking at houses for sale, or whatever. She's on her computer pretty much all the time she's home.
Stillhope - If I were content to have a mediocre lukewarm marriage, do you think I would even be here on this forum? I already have that and have lived it for the past 17 or so years. When sex became an obligatory chore for my wife instead of a way for us to connect and build our love for one another, I began to lose my connection with her.
I spent 10 lonely years grasping to feel any kind of connection (to feel anything at all for that matter). Thinking I could separate sex and love I turned to porn and strippers. Eventually I ended up having an affair and all the while thinking that I could balance my family life and my secret sex life on the side. I never wanted things be that way and I had become something that I hated. I was out of control and what I did was wrong, but it *did* happen because she had no desire for me any longer.
All I ever wanted was to feel that true connection with my wife. If she does not want it with me then I have no choice. I will no longer live a life without passion, it will be with one woman that I love, cherish and care for. I want so badly for her to be *the one* again. If that one woman is to be her, she is the only one that can make that decision, I cannot decide this for her.
Stillhope - If your wife suddenly decided to give you sex again would you be happy if her attitude about it was: OK you can get some tonight. Hurry up and let's get this over with. I don't enjoy this, but I'm doing it for you because you want it and it's just my obligation. Don't expect anything special because you should feel lucky that you are getting anything at all. Hurry up already! ???
Cinco, I don't think we get Walter Williams here. Our paper has its own editorialists & columnists & picks up some regularly from other papers, but once in awhile runs a column from someone we don't see often. I'll have to watch for him. Our paper has been running a column every couple weeks lately about how it isn't biased cuz reader's complain so much. My H thinks it was biased toward Dems & others complain about bias toward Repub's. I agree w/the editor, that if you read ALL the columns & letters to the Ed. that they present an equal balance. Then they go on the bottom of the birdcage LOL.
I feel your pain on the frequency, but lack of enthusiasm thing. As I said awhile back, I don't have the guts to do the 180 & not ask for sex. I'm afraid he'll take me up on it. Would your W? J
me: 66 H:60 2 adult sons 2 grandsons adult daughter deceased 5/05 me:Part time trainer H: plant suprv.
Jayce - Newspapers? We don't need no stinkin' newspapers! Is there a way to use them as a cat box though? I read all my news online, you need to fast forward to the 21st century girl! Here's a link to Walter's column archives if you are interested (BTW he's an economics prof at GMU). They're free too!: http://www.gmu.edu/departments/economics/wew/articles.html
You are right about it feeling like a "grilling" to her, although she thinks of it as be "analyzed" or "under the microscope". Reading the book to her? I don't know if that would go over. Hmmm maybe I might try it sometime anyway.
If I did a 180 and just stopped asking for sex she would be in heaven. Her ideal is for us to live out our lives together as best friends, sharing the responsibilities of our household and a raising our daughter in a platonic relationship. Sound familiar?
Coming from someone who did do that guys, I don't think it works. lol I think each spouse is diff, but when I pulled a 180, I went 2 years without ANYTHING! I don't think he was in heaven per say, I think he thought >> Wow, what a nice marriage now, my life is perfect. I'm not even sure he noticed there was no sex. All he noticed was there was no more arguing or crying, weeeeeeeeeee for him.. :S
Stillhope - No problem, I do really have more to be thankful for than I sometimes see for myself. I do know how it feels to be in your shoes. We went for a time when we ML twice a year for a few years and then once a year. It IS totally frustrating when you can't get your spouse to join you and connect with and see how much you are hurting.
Ok now onto the progress report. Yesterday we were both GALing and doing our own things. She now has time to knit a new pair of socks so she was doing that most of the day. I washed a sick cat's butt (don't ask), applied for some more job postings and did some paperwork for my mom. In the evening I was listening to some music and noticed W had gone to bed but had left the light on. She may have been reading.
I decided to wrap up my listening time to join her. I really had no expectations; I just wanted to lie next to her before we both fell asleep. I am going to bed with her whenever she does now, or at least as often as possible. When I came into the room she turned the light off, not sure if she was waiting for me or it was just a coincidence. The TV was on and she was watching an old movie. It had just started so I joined her to watch.
Sometimes W has lower back pain around her tailbone area and I noticed she was rubbing herself there. I offered to rub for her and kept on rubbing until she felt better (about 15 mins). I caressed and massaged her back and arms for another 20 mins or so.
Then I flipped around so I could rub her feet. It's still fairly warm here so we were on top of the covers. I remembered what Jayce said about the nerves in the feet being connected to the same part of the female brain as the clitoris. "Hmmm wonder if it's true", I thought to myself. Massaged her feet and legs for about 30 mins or so, really concentrating on her arches.
I rubbed and caressed her back and arms some more until the movie was over. She seemed very relaxed and comfortable with my touching her. You could say we'd just had about an hour and a half of foreplay. When the movie ended and she turned the TV off, she turned to me for a kiss.
We were both very much primed and ready but still took things very slowly. I was amazed at how turned on she had become. (Since we weren't in hurry-up mode I guess.) Maybe there is something to that foot/clit connection? I know Jayce is now wondering about lube. I'm not sure any was even needed but I used saliva and made sure there was plenty while I was...um down there. Also added more to... myself before ML.
Ok here is one of the best parts, she actually told me how to position myself so she would be most comfortable. THIS IS HUGE Y'ALL! She rarely talks at all during ML and for her to tell me what to do... WOW, it's a big step forward. Now comfortable and feeling just right, ML to her husband while he knew how to touch and kiss her in just the right places and just the right ways, she had a huge O.
I know this because I could feel her contractions while still inside of her. I don't even remember the last time that happened. I'm so happy that we got to share this. I'm not writing to brag but if you had asked me if I would ever get to experience this with my wife again, even a few days ago, I would have said it was very doubtful. Very slowly, with lots of tiny steps forward (and backwards) we may finally be getting to where our passion for each other is returning.
Last night may have started out as her allowing me to touch her because she knows it pleases me. What ended up happening is that she got to feel how good it really can be for us. We just need to allow ourselves the time to relax and enjoy one another. It took us back to a time when we had our whole lives ahead of us, no cares in the world, only each other to please and enjoy. That is all I want for us. I know I want to return to that place again and again. Maybe she has seen a glimpse of what I have been hoping for her to see for so long.
I'm so happy to have a friend like you mi cyber-amigo. 
Here's a link to Walter's column archives if you are interested (BTW he's an economics prof at GMU). They're free too!:
Her ideal is for us to live out our lives together as best friends, sharing the responsibilities of our household and a raising our daughter in a platonic relationship. Sound familiar?
