Peace I have no idea on the D thing. Could it be that you could simply say I don't want a D, let's just drop this whole thing. Could it be that easy?
I know that my h stayed away due to depression, guilt, pride, it is all kind of bundled together. What the time and space does is allow your h to come around, see that he wants to stay m and if possible get some mc and ic.
This does take years of patience and loving uncondtionally and being supportive and respectful of your h and not pushing them into soemthing they may not agree with.
Would you want your h to wait for you and be patient if you were in a crisis?
Me 50 H 42 S 22 S 9 D 7 M 12 T 17 H moved out 8/2006 H moved home 1/2007 for 3 weeks H moved home 5/2011 for good
"Learn from yesterday ~ Live for today ~ And hope for tomorrow"