The results are in...Dust myself off & start again

[Treese]

Hello All....I've been away....trying to pull myself together and waiting for the paternity results....
Well....I found out about an hour ago that my H is the father of the love child....I can't put into words the heartache, the pain, the sadness I feel....I'm so lonely....H has known a few days but decided to keep that from me until he was ready to tell me also...again...over the phone cause he can't face me....I immediately started crying...sorry folks but my world has been slowly crumbling around me...to make a long story short...H has to appear in court next month..(Merry Christmas to us)..I said you know you will have to start paying child support and he said, "well, lets wait and see what happens...it's not her fault we have to go to court",I said, "WHAT??", "why do you think she filed?. what world is he living in?? Seriously...he is so far out of touch with reality its not even funny...he sounded like it was just another day....I did tell him this news crushed me and he said, "I know, Treese"...no I'm sorry, nothing....he said he doesn't talk to the mother of the child....for Heaven's sake he works right next to her....I am sick to my stomach....I've been crying for 2 hours....I'm lonely...I want a hug....I want to curl up in a corner and not come out....I want to run away...I'm exhausted...worn out...I have no strength left....

Then, last evening my D16 was in a car accident...she wasn't driving but the car was thrown up against a wall and it was her side that hit...she is pretty banged up but she will be okay I think...wet roads caused her friend to slip into another car and be bounced off into the wall....I did not call H last night..I felt why...he wouldn't answer his phone...I dealt with it on my own....

Tonight I have to work a football game at school....my nerves are shot....but at least I will get out of the house for a while...then I will come home to an empty house...s11 went with H for the night....I may call a friend....

Well, gotta run for now...more later....


Treese