On a positive note, I went to the gym to meet with the personal trainer and was 15 minutes late! I had the time wrong in my mind... oops!
I'm really out of shape... surprise! She said she could tell I was strong... (YaY.. wrassling boys as a Texas girl paid off). She said I had good form and could tell I had done this in the past... (YaY.. I love compliments even when I'm gasping too desperately for breath to acknowledge them.)
She said I was going to do great when I did the crunches where you pull up with your hands behind your head and then lift a big ole yoga ball toward your elbows by digging in your feet to pull it forward.
I saw how super light the weights were and was THANKFUL! Let me tell you.. I get this outta shape.. I will take any bit of help. It is funny feeling the muscles on my back that attach to the side of my ribs today. When I lift my arms it feels like someone severed angel wings I never knew I had.
Ms. Donna.. I tried to get ahold of you to do something last night. My middle son called (who's a college freshman) about coming home this weekend. The ride he could have gotten had already left. I'd said I'd bring him back if he could get a ride home. I wavered.. my poor floofy body was sooo tie-tie. When my daughter did that melt your heart thing.. "I miss my brudder." we called my son to let him know we'd pick him up (and take him home).
Part of me had avoided doing it because he was coming down to see his dad and his father wouldn't put forth the effort to see our son. Then like a buddy pointed out.... Let's see.. you get to have at least an hour and a half alone time with a child you rarely see... What's could be wrong with that equation? (Don't you sometimes hate folks who can see the big picture so well.. and are so thankful you know them? *hugs*)
We had dinner before leaving his school at this one restaurant we really like. It was the same place we went to tell the kids about their dad wanting a divorce. Last night we were seated right next to that fateful corner table for six. The kids sat with their back away from it. I was a little heart twinged at times, part of me reliving that terrible severing pain. It did help there was a wild child (about 2.5 years old) at that spot who'd grab the curtains that were about 15 to 20 feet long and tug them with all her might. Wondering about how hard those puppies could land on us was a helpful distraction.
So.. he's home, we're making some favorite foods tonight.
****
Last night I read my lawyer's reply that had some very good pointed questions and thoughts about going forward with what spouse and I discussed.
I'll compose a reply later today about what I see as a conflict.. and what her advice is.
