Hi everyone, Wow - lots of activity on this thread today! {{{{{{{twin hope}}}}}}}}}}}}} you were missed. I was worried about ya. Glad you are doing well and GAL.
Welcome Baby Girl. T2L runs a great stich here and it keeps our sanity on most days. So you mentioned that you are going for chemo? Are you ok and how is it going. How nice to be hit with that and a cheating spouse. Everything at once. But when the good comes it will come in waves. I know this.
T2L, or should I say night owl, like you I used to stay up very late but lately I go to bed before midnight. I feel exhausted at night which never used to happen. But I am trying to follow what my body is trying to do and listen to it.
I saw my H today. I had mail for him and he asked if I could stop at his desk. It started off well, we discussed work and had a pretty good conversation and he was asking about D15. I filled him in what she was up to, H told me he texted her but she did not answer. H said I don't know what to do -- so I asked what did the C say? (he asked for the # last week), H said I haven't called him. I did not say anything. I said I know she is mad but maybe show up for church or something like that even if you don't sit with her (was that ok to say?). Then his secret phone rings, H hits the silence button and looks panicky. I said well I can see you are busy and will go. H says don't start...I said well at least she gave me the best laugh yesterday. H says this is why I don't like to talk to you. (yes I screwed up), I left and then sent him an e-mail saying "I'm sorry the end of our conversation got screwed up. I try to detach from you but sometimes the leftover hurt comes out. We just miss you" ok T2L, take out the whipping post. I do well and then boom I get emotional. This darn Italian blood is the death of me!
I tried to redeem myself. We had our 1 pm staff meeting, I went in and did not acknowledge him. Sat down so his back was to me. I looked in the opposite direction. I saw H turn around a couple of times to see what I was doing. I never looked directly at him. They talked about our X-mas party and encouraged us all to go. (we went last year together and the OW went with her then BF). The meeting ended, I was the first one up and out the door so H did not think I was trying to talk to him. Won't see him now till next week.
I need to follow what T2L says about concentrating on the holidays with our families. I have been dreading going back to CT to visit everyone. I have always enjoyed it but this year my heart is heavy that H will stay here with OW for both X-mas and New Year. I am sure OW is loving it that we will not be around and trying to make a new tradition with H. I keep praying that the more H is with her the more he will tire of her. Need to keep posting to keep my sanity. Glad I am supported here and we give support to each other.
Me 53 H 50 D16, D29 M 22 years bomb 7/08 INH - alien pod replaces H 8/08 - OW (direct report), I work there also bomb II - H moves 10/1 expose ow 10/22 D to be final 9-09
