Hi NW: Thanks for the optimism. I hope you're right - it does seem like it will be a good weekend with the boys...so I'm very excited about that.
I went to a men's group last night - invited by my landlord (who almost divorced from his wife when they lived in this house just three years ago). It was an interesting night - and an opportunity to talk about what I've been going through with people who don't know me or my W. I explained a lot of what had gone on over the last few months - the anger, the abuse, the blowups, the threats of going to a woman's shelter, the intense love I have for my Wife...everything I could remember...there were two licensed therapists in the group...and when I was finished they both sighed heavily, recognized that I was in a very painful situation, and then both said that, if everything I had said was accurate, that my W is most likely bipolar.
They encouraged the idea of an intervention done by her family - but, since I know that her family won't do that...there's really not much that can happen other than a 5150 - in which she is a danger to herself or another person - and she gets taken away for 72 hours...the risk there, so I was told, is that usually the child gets taken away from the father too - and put in foster care - until the situation gets sorted out (since usually the 5150 patient accuses the other of abuse). So...there are still plenty of layers of hell ahead of me - but what can I do but live through it and stay as strong as possible.
I think my wife starts her actual therapy next week - she went in just for the evaluation a couple weeks back. So now is the time for me to be patient and supportive - and maintain my PMA. I have to take care of myself and my kids - and that's what I'll keep doing - without any compromise.
At least it's Friday...tomorrow I get time with both of my boys and then I get several days in a row with my S11. That's joy. That is life.
BTW - NW - I just reread the tag at the end of your profile. "Wife is looking for "The one" which is not me." Is that something she had said? Because I don't think she's really looking for the one - from what I've read of your situation - she's looking for herself...and just doesn't know how to get there. It's a scary journey for people going through what she's experiencing - and sometimes finding oneself is the most challenging and frustrating work anyone can do.
