Trying2live-Post #4

[faithrunner]

Well, I'm not sure if I smelled great after work all day, but I was cheerful and confident!!

T2L, Hope, and BG, I can't thank you enough for the rally! I took to heart all your advice and here's what I did.

I usually let H know that I'm leaving work to get the kids, so I responded to the email 2 hrs after he sent it with a brief message: "sorry it took me so long to respond, we were swamped today! I hope your student is ok. I'm off to get the guys!"

So that was what I sent before I read T2L's response as I was driving to get the kids (I know, not the safest, but I was dying to read it). Three things resonated with me: reducing negative emotions, avoiding love busters, and a soft response. I was also praying as I was thinking about this and God directed me to be compassionate b/c he is hurting today. He knew this was a tall order, given the week we had. But, when I read your statement about a soft answer turning away wrath, I felt a peace come over me. I knew I could do it.

So, when I called him to tell him I picked up with the guys, I could tell he sounded a little wrung out. I told him something funny about the kids, he laughed and we joked around a little. Then I said, I'm sorry you had a rough afternoon. He said, well it wasn't that it was rough . . . I said, well it was really nice of you to let your student vent like that. She has no idea the kindness you showed her. He says you're probably right, we can talk more about it later. I say bye.

I have thought for a while that admiration is one of his top needs (I swear I'm getting that book this weekend!!!), and I felt like it was big for him to share his feelings with me - esp given that he said he can't open up to me, so that's why I felt I had to acknowledge that he was upset today. Plus it hit me that he never even had to email me about what happened in the first place! (even if the apology still irritates me)

My goal for when he got home was to keep everything light and really avoid talking about it anymore. We joked with the kids, I made a great dinner and we had a really good time. He even invited me to go with him and the kids for their plans on Sunday. I said thanks, but I have plans. He said, ok, great(looking down). I didn't give details, but was dying to join them! I had told him Monday that his plans with the kids sounded great and I wouldn't be going. I didn't think I'd get the second invite. When he left he said, call me if you or the kids need anything. I like when he says that b/c I figure he'll be alone. And he called right after he left, another common thing he does, to check on the kids (are they asleep yet? Well, it's been 2 seconds, so no:)

All in all, I think it went well. Agree?

You folks are priceless!