I've been PISSED for the past several days since getting more discovery information from spouse's lawyer. One thing included was his new bank account which is a joint account with him and his companion. It got me so mad, seemed so insulting.. and he seemed so stupid to do that.
I fumed, I stomped, I called friends for support, I yelled, I cried, I reread it again and just tried to rip that damn fantasy connection I still hold with him.
I know that seeing that information isn't anything new about what's been going on. I know that probably that was done for effect and/or commitment on his part to her and that it's none of my business. I know that each wave that whacks me isn't as bad as the last.
But oh my goodness. I went through the info reading everything and making notes of questions for my lawyer, saying what I would not passively accept diminished support even though the legal system endorses it. Perhaps it was the woman scorned thing but I figured it was time to grow some balls and take charge of my destiny.
In the lengthy note, I wrote that I was not going to communicate with him (I now refer to him as Mr. LastName) anymore because I keep forgetting that his interests are no longer in my best interest, that I fall into the 'we work together, we're a team' mentality.
Today he called and left a message. He wants to talk about the divorce and see what we can do together to move it along. He added that he had a very good lawyer and that they were becoming more aggressive. Well duh.. that's what he's paying his expensive lawyer to do! He wants me to call him back.
Here's where I need your help.
Part of me wants to tell him what I need to make a smooth divorce. I know I should write my lawyer and ask her advice which would probably be to listen and not commit to anything.
But I just get so foot stomping mad.. whenever I see him write the word 'divorce' or 'adding all five of us to the medical benefits then removing you (me) when the divorce is final' I just want to blow a gasket.
I know I have to let it go.. know this is part of the process.. but man oh man.. it just (insert suitable #$%^%$!!$%) me!!!!!
