Well, I need to properly read up on your sitch for an in-depth answer.
I will offer you this. My W has had multiple A's in the last three years. I have done the same thing as you, stuff my emotions to keep the peace.
Right now, I'm cordial to my W when we're together. She hasn't "officially" left the marital residence; though she's here less than she's not. When we're not together; I do not contact her at all except in matters of the kids or finances. I prefer it that way; because it keeps my emotions and anger in check.
The big difference though is that I have the kids. She doesn't care enough to even wake up in the morning to see them most times. So my W is a WAW and a WAMom. It certainly makes the no contact easier for me, I believe.
