During our separation, I really felt things were happening out of my control. The often-repeated mantra "you can't change the WAS or their feelings and actions." But I have learned that the choices we make CAN change things. I don't say that just because my D was busted. I honestly believe that what I learned during this process has made me a better person, and that my life had a bright future even without W. We can make our lives and our selves better, even through S and D.
Now that my M is restored, what I learned and the changes I made within myself can now be applied to my R with my loving, beautiful, and darling wife. Our days to come is what we make them. Where our future lies is where we take it. We are living through something better than a second honeymoon right now. It is the rediscovery of our love for each other, an appreciation for what we nearly lost, and a commitment from us both to do the work necessary to ensure that what we went through this past year will never happen again.
It saddens me to see the struggles my friends here are still going through. But I know that the strength of character I see on these boards will create a wonderful future for you all, as long as you continue the work on yourselves and to live your lives to their full potential.
Me45 W35 M6 T8 D16 SD11 D0 Dec 07: Bomb July 08: Busted! Thread
Missed you. Glad to see that you are still happy! I read Lodo's good bye to DB this past week end. Really sad but sweet. I know he is going to be ok but miss him already. So don't off and ride into the sunset just yet ok? lol
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
We closed on our construction loan last week, and will close on the sale of our old home next week. The movers pack up the non-essential stuff at the house yesterday and it will stay instorage until the new place is ready. The hole in the ground is taking shape, though it has been slow going with the weather being wet lately. But soon it will turn cold and the ground will freeze, so we are rushing against Mother Nature.
SD8 has been really great with me, letting me hug her more and asking me to do stuff with her more. It really feels good. W SD8 and I had a group C sessions a couple of weeks ago - that seemed to be a turning point.
D14 is busy with school and her theater group. She is going to be in a production this winter and so is spending a lot of time rehearsing. When I told her about the new house, I expected a negative resonse, but she gave it the teenage stamp of approval -"cool!" W and I will be going down to NYC for Thanksgiving (SD8 will be with her father). Hoping for a good trip!
Me45 W35 M6 T8 D16 SD11 D0 Dec 07: Bomb July 08: Busted! Thread
I am so glad you are getting everything that you so richly deserve. Teenagers, who can figure them out? I am glad that she might be coming around a bit. Just wait until she starts talking about boys all the time!
I would say send us pictures of the house but you don't occupy the alternate universe anymore.
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
