Well, God knows what you did, putting your wife and boys first, and why you did it. End of story. Plus the friends in your life know, and understand.
Glad you got to see them on Halloween and glad they went with you. It was a loss to your wife if she blew them off for plans, but you gain, mister. Your gain.
Well, God knows what you did, putting your wife and boys first, and why you did it. End of story. Plus the friends in your life know, and understand.
Glad you got to see them on Halloween and glad they went with you. It was a loss to your wife if she blew them off for plans, but you gain, mister. Your gain.
Everything she said!!! I also think well yeah, it didn't work out with DBing as we maybe hoped. But if we hadn't tried and DB'd maybe we would have felt like we hadn't tried everything for our M. I think I would have felt much differently about the D if I hadn't worked very hard this past year. And I've really worked on myself which will benefit any future Rs, and the same thing goes for you. My H and your W just gave up and didn't try, got involved with a new OP, I just can't believe at some point they won't regret that where we will know that we don't have those kind of regrets. And I suspect you're like me and a lot of the not giving up is just because of the kids and fighting for them will always be a no-brainer I think. Karen
And, yes, it really is about the kids now. They're now my raison d'etre.
I was thinking about this in church today. I was hearing about the various missions my church is involved in when I started thinking about the act of serving to build the kingdom of God. I thought about how a couple of the times this year when I had volunteered to help, my plans seemed to go awry, mainly because of scheduling conflicts due to taking care of two young children. It reminded me of a sermon by Tony Evans about how God intended for the bulk of the work to build His kingdom to be handled by unattached singles.
Well, by me having a family, it really should leave me out of most of that kingdom-building stuff anyway. Instead, God intends for we parents to place more focus on our children, to raise them in the way of the Lord -- that is our highest priority in this circumstance.
Yes. There will be time to build kingdoms later in life.
Now, its all about the kiddos. Which is how it should be. Which is why we sacrifice and do things that are icky for us, for their benefit. It feels right that way, doesn't it?
Yes, it does. God intended for us, as Christ's followers, to get the majority of our life's duties and contributions to the church completed prior to marriage and family. Once we marry and start raising a family, we are expected to focus on spouse and children instead, because it is through the family that tomorrow's kingdom-builders are to be made.
I see so many adults with children get bogged down in their own personal ministries, to the detriment of their spouse and children. That's not doing God any real favors, mind you. It's not what he wants. Even we Christians cannot see the forest for the trees sometimes. But that's why the Apostle Paul had forsaken marriage in his own life, because God had such a fervent calling on his life and he knew he could not serve both purposes effectively.
But even non-Christians are well-advised to change their priorities once they get married. We all think we can have it all.
W then started talking about the poor and worsening state of the economy, and how this financial crisis was going to put a severe damper on our chances to sell our house.
Reminds me of my sitch in 2004. Those were tough times yet there was value in them. We ended up losing on sale of house. Well I did anyway. Was gasping for my next breath just to stay alive while XW wanted to sell house and had OM head up the moving party when she moved out. That was a pivotal day for me. When I found out I truly wanted to die.
Her family claimed to be disgusted but never actually did anything about it. Yet... I know feel a deep sense of confidence that God has this situation in hand too. He has served me up some value from it... as agonizing as it was at the time.
Anyway... do not mean to put neg spin on this phase for ya.... just to say no matter how painful it is emotionally and financially... value can come from it. Am sure you know that.
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I still wonder if she wants me to take over the house to not only have to buy her out but so she wouldn't have to face the guilt -- especially the guilt of having to paint over our S's murals that I painted for them.
NoCode... brother... I feel your pain.
Oh man. That was probably the hardest thing for me. We had decorated the kids rooms. They loved their rooms. And just so mommy could have her way, we were gonna sell them out from under them. She actually did.
Thats how I felt at the time. Yet I got through it. What will WA spouses not do to get what they want? Unbridled selfishness is a powerful thing. Cemented in by a thick layer of denial.
You seem to be dealing with it better than I did.
Sounds like you have a pretty healthy perspective on keeping kids forefront too.
Chazz, welcome. Any time. Almost missed your latest post above. Like you said, lots of similarities.
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Sounds like you have a pretty healthy perspective on keeping kids forefront too.
I try, brother. I try. I know that's what God expects of me.
Tal, I saw the pictures of your boys -- I'm glad they had a great Halloween.
It's so funny how they all get so engrossed by commercial properties -- Transformers, Harry Potter, Hot Wheels, Pokemon, ... I just hope it remains just as cute when they're teenagers. LOL.
Tal, I saw the pictures of your boys -- I'm glad they had a great Halloween.
It's so funny how they all get so engrossed by commercial properties -- Transformers, Harry Potter, Hot Wheels, Pokemon, ... I just hope it remains just as cute when they're teenagers. LOL.
NC, Yes, they do stay engrossed by commercial properties when they are teens, but it's designer clothing, purses, and fancy cars then. I miss the days when my girls worried about Barney, Power Rangers, and Barbies!
Yoyo
Life's challenges are not supposed to paralyze you, they're supposed to help you discover who you are. -- Bernice Johnson Reagon
I miss the days when my girls worried about Barney, Power Rangers, and Barbies!