heavy weekend, really need to start getting some sleep, but going through a bad spell where sleeping is concerned. Also, must stop drinking redbull on nights out as I just wake up to early and don't get enough sleep !!!
Not to much to report really, just partying a bit and all day sat with the boys. Did speak to MIL on phone Sat morning as she was having the boys Sat night and she asked after me. Sounded quite concerened but I didn't say a lot.
When to do some food shopping yeaterday and bumped into STBX and boys which was really nice. They were so excited to see me, tho I'm sure the other shoppers thought it odd when we were 3 check outs apart and the boys going back and forth !!! lol.
Boys again tonight and highlight of this week is a fireworks party round a friends and taking the boys. Pretty uneventful time of it really.
STBX just rang (I was about to text) re this afternoon and arrangement for boys which was fine. Then she again starts the when you having the boys overnight conversation so usual, when I've got a place, when is that, after xmas etc. She then say, would I like to stay at the house one night with them ? I'm like ermmm, maybe, you've just thrown it at me. That is basically what I suggested 3 months ago and was a big no no, so why now ? The boys keeping her up ? time with another man ?. She said she would sleep at her mums but I cannot fathom why now.
The bit that annoys me ? Well, I'd jump at the chance but I just hate being in that house now. It no longer feels like my home, it's got to many bad memories for me. Has she slept with another man in our bed ? I know she came home at least once after sleeping with another man and got in that bed with me....all that stuff just makes it feel dirty to me.
I dont think you are over reacting Arthur, I feel the same way about this house and I havent even left yet! But considering staying over, it will good time spent with the kids. Dont worry about what your STBX is doing, she is going to do it anyway. Sleep on a couch if you are too skeezed about the bed, I would be too.
Married 6 years D4 D4 S2 seperated: 7/15/08 Dbomb: 9/21/08 status: seperated in same home, meeting with mediator moving toward D current thread
MM - That is the difficult bit tho. S2 would likely come looking for me in the night from what she says and also, S6 and possibly S2 might get false hope. S6 has said things like some mummys and daddys get back together before.
I also refuse to help her have a new relationship and feel she should take some responsibility for her choices in all this. she hasn't as yet and seems the cake she is eating is starting to turn off. Don't want to give her some new cake !!!
STBX just rang (I was about to text) re this afternoon and arrangement for boys which was fine. Then she again starts the when you having the boys overnight conversation so usual, when I've got a place, when is that, after xmas etc. She then say, would I like to stay at the house one night with them ? I'm like ermmm, maybe, you've just thrown it at me. That is basically what I suggested 3 months ago and was a big no no, so why now ? The boys keeping her up ? time with another man ?. She said she would sleep at her mums but I cannot fathom why now.
The bit that annoys me ? Well, I'd jump at the chance but I just hate being in that house now. It no longer feels like my home, it's got to many bad memories for me. Has she slept with another man in our bed ? I know she came home at least once after sleeping with another man and got in that bed with me....all that stuff just makes it feel dirty to me.
Am I over reacting ?
I say get all that other stuff out of your head..What does it matter..It's more time with your boys Arthur..I would take her up on it..
so what if it no longer feels like your home..If you had them over your moms it would not be your home either..
Mike - I think you replied as I did, see my last response to MM.
I do understand, but do you not think she is playingon me spending time with the boys to suit her ? Do you not think, whatever her reasons, it is a way for her to have more of the cake she has been eating for 9 months.
It should only be another 2 or 3 months now til I get a place and we have mediation on Monday, so I will tell her I will not decide til after mediation next week, but I am not comfortable in that house so would rather not spend a night there.
Mike - I think you replied as I did, see my last response to MM.
I do understand, but do you not think she is playingon me spending time with the boys to suit her ? Do you not think, whatever her reasons, it is a way for her to have more of the cake she has been eating for 9 months.
It should only be another 2 or 3 months now til I get a place and we have mediation on Monday, so I will tell her I will not decide til after mediation next week, but I am not comfortable in that house so would rather not spend a night there.
I think it makes no difference how much "cake she eats" if you are done?? I mean if you are truly done then what does that matter to you. If you are truly detached from her then why concern yourself with who she is doing??
and if she has been "eating cake" for 9 months..whether you are there or not makes no difference..she will find a way to do it no matter what..
I say decide if you want to see the boys extra time or not..in surroundings that are somewhat familiar..you don't have to sleep in that bed..sleep on the couch..sleep in the boys bed..have a camp out on the floor..
you're in a tough sitch not having your own place..I figure this is an opportunity for you..to have them overnight..wake up with them..put them to bed..
up to you..do what's best for YOU and those BOYS..she is an afterthought..
