hey tom. yeah sounds like a test, and I agree with LIS no figuring allowed. plus it really gives you a headache lol!
how is my bud doing today? how is D liking the kittens? I could send her a couple more ya know lol!
M 36 XH 34 3 children If a house is divided against itself, that house will not be able to stand. Mark 3:25 "your mood swings are giving me whiplash" twilight ALIVE FREE AND HAPPY 2010
was gonna tell you, go read my thread, about the orange beer can, maybe it will help you the next time your W makes you angry, and even if it doesnt it sure will make you laugh your bootie off!
M 36 XH 34 3 children If a house is divided against itself, that house will not be able to stand. Mark 3:25 "your mood swings are giving me whiplash" twilight ALIVE FREE AND HAPPY 2010
I just moved them up from the basement to a quiet, dark spot in the great room. I think that mama kitty wanted to rejoin the family. So I accommodated her. But they're doing well and according to the W; they are all accounted for. Whew!!!
i am telling you something about kittens or puppies, they so heal a childs soul. perfect timeing Tom, for your D! LOL I still freak and count my 4 MANY times a day, they have to be outside, momma CANT be in here lol!
M 36 XH 34 3 children If a house is divided against itself, that house will not be able to stand. Mark 3:25 "your mood swings are giving me whiplash" twilight ALIVE FREE AND HAPPY 2010
So it's been interesting. My IC appt. was postponed today. So I went to the bookstore and read for awhile, drank coffee while I was there, ate some cheesecake, and bought "I hate you, don't leave me." W texted me during the time I was gone. I was supposed to meet her at her job to get the kids. She was not feeling well so she went in late. Her text was to tell me that and that I should just come home. I didn't respond. So about an hour later she called me. I told her that I got the message. and that I would see her later. I hung up first. Waited until the very last half hour before she left to come home.
DISCLAIMER: The following is out of the mouth of a WAW! Believe it at your own risk.
It seems that there might be trouble in GF land. Seems that my W got invited to a local Republican party tonight to watch election returns. Shes "says" that she was invited by an older woman she has met. Anyway, she tells me that dysfunctional BFF is pi$$ed that she isn't invited. The W tells her that she is not socially adept enough to attend a political function. That she would have to explain everything to her. So BFF says "you calling me stupid?" The W says "well I have to explain everything to you." "Besides do you have any business casual wear that doesn't ride up the crack of your Azz?" BFF, "I can buy some." W replies, "well I can't really take the liberty of inviting someone as I was invited by someone else."
Anyway, I guess if the above is really true; I'd love to be there the next time these two get together. LOL. I love it. Watching the drama from the sidelines and yet it doesn't affect me or the kids. It's a good feeling.
So the W put her rings back on today for the first time since last Monday. She's been calling me sweetheart and honey. She also told me that she wanted me to come; but the invite wasn't there. yeah, right. pull this finger.
ugh please dont pull his finger! really, we have had to much mexican food, and H and D1 both are gassing me out lol! I dont need that over the internet! hehehehe, ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh have to joke.
wow tom. breathe, want my orange can? give it to god, really right now! do it! dont make me come there and leave the land of ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhsss lol!
M 36 XH 34 3 children If a house is divided against itself, that house will not be able to stand. Mark 3:25 "your mood swings are giving me whiplash" twilight ALIVE FREE AND HAPPY 2010
I'm good. I like it when she's gone. I was a little bad today. I drove by where winggirl21 works to see if she was there. She wasn't, so I stayed away. But the thought had entered my mind; so I've got to have a plan for the next time I do that and she's there.
ok bud, heres the zillion dollar question. do you EVER want your W back there? just asking, I am trying to figure out my stuff, so since some things with us are alike, do ya? and would ya teach me if he IS GONE how to not stress??
M 36 XH 34 3 children If a house is divided against itself, that house will not be able to stand. Mark 3:25 "your mood swings are giving me whiplash" twilight ALIVE FREE AND HAPPY 2010
ok bud, heres the zillion dollar question. do you EVER want your W back there? just asking, I am trying to figure out my stuff, so since some things with us are alike, do ya? and would ya teach me if he IS GONE how to not stress??
I don't think that I have the zillion dollar answer. Since we only live one day at a time; today I don't want her. I like living stress free. While we don't have a lot of conflict, there's still some animosity that I feel for her and what she's been doing. I like the freedom I have when she's not around. Why don't I feel like I have freedom when she's here? I don't know; I've got to work that out for me to fully detach. I also like the prospect of finding someone "normal." It's an exciting feeling.
It's hard to want someone when you feel that they have a personality disorder that cannot be cured; or they don't want a cure. It's hard when all you hear from her family is that she's been this way since age 10. It's hard when her own father says that I've been stupid and I'd be better off without her. It's hard when her sister tells me to cut my losses. It's hard when you know that they are still actively online searching for another. It's hard when you've been trying to save the family for years and you get hit with I just want out. So basically I think I've given up on all the things that I've done in the past to try and save the M. I've handed it over to God now. I started this DB'ing process and so far I've found ME and I've found that I'm eager for a new life.
But I still keeping looking for that miracle that turns it all around so my kids will have mommy and daddy under the same roof. That's why I haven't slammed the window yet. But if I had the money to start the process AND end it the way I want it to end; I would've already filed. So maybe this is God's way of slowing ME down; cause I'm ready for a new life. I'm sooooo tired of this one.
I just keep my eyes and head pointed forward, knowing that better days are ahead. That keeps me going. When she's not here, it's easy for me to focus on that. When she's not here, it blatantly tells me that I don't NEED her because I'm still breathing and the kids are happy. So I'm living proof that life goes on without a WAS.
The big key for me was when I stopped depending on her. Once I had mine and the kid's life set up where we could survive and operate without her; my stress went away. All the A's have jaded me over time, so the attachment to her isn't there for me. I'm not physically attracted to her anymore either. But if the miracle happens, maybe I could make the decision to come back. Right now, I'm not there.
