Well, I called my wife and told her that I found out about my 401k, how we would deal with the house, and how we would split things. I think that caught her off guard a bit because her voice got quieter and then she said she didn't understand the house stuff. I told her that I think that both of us are emotional right now and that we should probably step back for a while and make sure that this is something that we really want to do because when we do it, it cannot be un-done. It will be forever and it will affect all of us including our two little girls. She agreed. She said that we could talk tonight as long as it was timed for one hour and no longer. I was surprised at this. I'm going to ask her to have this one hour to talk every weekend so that I will know where she is emotionally and I can talk to her about stuff as well. I'm going to ask her what went well for her during the week and what didn't go so well so that we can address any issues and make things better for the both of us. If we don't have much to talk about in those regards I think it would be good for her to tell me about her week and I will listen closely. Maybe she will start to tell me how she is really feeling and maybe it will feel good to her that I am listening for a change. I want to give her the same feedback as well. I also told her that maybe we should move the computer up into her craft room so that I can't hear her playing. I told her that this hurts me the most when I hear her playing with those guys online. She didn't say anything when I suggested that.
Then I have no idea why I asked this, but I did. I asked her if it would still be ok to take her out to dinner every now and then. She said ok. I asked about date nights and she said ok as well.
I'm going to really suggest that we back up to being friends and make a real effort to be friends. Especially in front of the kids. Act as if! So I think that will get us interacting much more and maybe we can get through this.
