So glad to see you are talking, what did she say when you asked for more touching?
As for her telling you when there is pain for you, WOOOTTTTTTTTT< that's a HUGE step in the right direction. If she starts to only feel pleasure, here's hoping she'll want more. But, still hope for you both that she still talks to the Dr.
But, still hope for you both that she still talks to the Dr. 
