For starters, Thank You for sharing you experiences. I am going through very similar circumstances. I am jealous that my wife texts numerous guy friends. In the past, I've expressed my anger towards her actions and this has never worked out well.
One realization that I came to a little while back is the following: If my wife leaves. I will be OK. Since I don't have control over whether she will leave, I might as well be OK now.
I understand how difficult it is to make day to day decisions. Especially, when you want to show your wife that you have changed, for the right reasons.
I think about my actions beforehand and wait to make a decision until it is for the right reasons.
I pray a lot, and that is incredibly helpful.
It sounds like you want her to stop playing that game.
