I think there's always hope. It would help if you would post a bit more detail like the # of years you've been married and how old your H is. He might be having an MLC or something.
My guess would be he is in a fog right now. Not an expert, others here are, but apparently the chemicals in their brains when starting a PA do lead to fog and craziness or whatever. You aren't supposed to believe what they say and only half of what they do (or something like that somebody correct me if I got that wrong please). The blaming you for stuff is part of the package I think; I've gone through that too. Obviously his losing his job was because of his own actions and at some point he should realize that. They also sometimes pick fights. There is all kinds of "script" behavior that they all seem to follow.
I think esp. if you are having no contact, you need to work on yourself, GAL as much as possible. Try new hobbies or old ones that you haven't done in a while. Try to focus on yourself rather than your H. Karen
