It starts out with some clear warnings that the road the wife is on isn't a good one...but she goes anyway because she' sintrigued by the OM.
As the story progresses, the fantasy changes to something very ugly and she realizes after a LOT of damage has taken place that she was really better off walking the other way at the beginning of the film.
The plot content really is mostly about a bad choice made and the chain reaction that results.
You will cry, but affairs are heavily criticized by this film, they aren't dealt with as romantic or humourous, which is the standard approach holly wood takes.
Hi whatdidido, you may also want to catch High Fidelity. Its mostly from the man's perspective with his GF cheating on him..panic attacks and obsessing, etc ...its all there.
The female that walked out on him went with a total creep...well portrayed in that sense.
This actually should help you get a perspective on where your husband was at/is at. Which should shake up the fantasy for you.
Don't watch with your husband, either film..it will just leave him in a lot of pain...educated, but hurt. It isnt' necessary for him to see them.
Ok just an observation, films that aren't even meant to send a message get my antenna up these days.
Vacation: We were watching Vacation w/Chevy Chase over the weekend and when he is getting in the pool with naked Christie Brinkley it is supposed to be funny, but I am thinking as I watch it this time, poor Wife! Her H is caught by the entire hotel guests in the pool w/a naked lady, what a jerk her H is!
And a new film, APPALOOSA:
H and I went to see that yesterday. There is ONE real female role in the entire thing. She turns out to be starved for attention/desires the Alpha male and will moved from guy to guy if the position of leadership changes....Made it uncomfortable to watch w/my H as he has a deep-seeded belief that women are fundamentally manipulative and untrustworthy. Never mind that HE cheated, not me...
Anyway this woman is with the Marshall of the town, building a house with him, and as soon as he is out of sight she is trying to make out with his best friend/deputy. The deputy was a good guy and turned her down. But she tried it again w/someone else down the line. Anyway, in our case, that was not a good thing to see...
I notice the comedies and such too. I just want to vomit when they show people cheating and portray it as funny, or just tragic.
Infidelity is a destructive behavior brought on by an emotional illness.
I think Unfaithful is the only film I have ever seen that captures that point.
You will find infidelity in many pieces of work.
Look at the comedy Friends :
Chandler : Cheats with Kathy on his best friend Joey Chandler : Cheats with Janice on Janice's husband and children Chandler : In the what if episode he cheated with Monica on her boyfriend the foot doctor Chandler : Cheated ON by Kathy, who had cheated WITH Chandler on Joey...Kathy was a serial offender.
Joey : Joey is a serial offender. There are not many major story lines, but he is characterized as promiscuous.
Ross : Cheated with the Copy store girl on Rachel, even though he insists they were "on a break"
Rachel : Cheated on by Paulo and Ross. Rachel : In the what if episode Rachel plotted to cheat with Joey on her husband. She was drunk and passed out, but it was still a huge part of the story
Rachel : Cheated with Barry on Barry's wife.
Phoebe : I think she was innocent the full ten years, but don't quote me on it.
Monica : I think Monica was innocent of an infidelity, but again don't quote me.
Overall, infidelity was a huge part of the show. In most cases it was characterized as tragic, not as a sickness that needs therapy and healing.
I am sick to death of TV and Big films that characterize infidelity as tragic romance. Its sleazy, hurtful, and selfish..not to mention highly destructive.
To my mind people who violate homes, families and relationships like this are offensive. It is one step above bullying, and two steps above pedophillia.
It isn't criminal, but it should be.
Its one thing to mess around as a teenager and hurt people, but once you hit 30 its time to grow up and realize these relationshps are delicate and spent years to build...and can be broken in a matter of moments if you catch them at a bad time.
There really should be more films out there like Unfaithful...I cry every time I see it, but its the most honest treatment of this experience I have yet found.
What I don't get is why on earth if I knew my husband could read minds...I would be senseless enough try to keep a secret of any kind?
Sorry but that just stretches the believability of the piece beyond silly. lol
If your spouse can read minds, you basically have to be an open book at all times...that must be a stressful home they live in. lol
Wikipedia description of the film "Unfaithful" describes the marriage as "solid."
While there was love there still, it was clear to me at least that there was considerable disconnect. What does everyone think about the state of Connie's marriage with Ed before the affair began?
The theme is that the heroes have these latent abilities that all emerge about the same time to avert some kind of apocalypse. Each hero goes through a crisis when he or she discovers their talent. In this case this, man who was low-ranking police officer, suddenly discovered that he could read people's thoughts.
The interesting part is that his wife started to cheat on him, largely did so because of his low self-esteeem. He kept beating himself up about his career failures and it turned her off. She ended up hooking up with a strong self-confident, successful man.
This theme repeats itself a lot in men's relationship manuals (Daeda and Cunningham).
Interesting premise. Bruce Willis plays a "hero" of sorts, who doesn't know he's got unusual abilities, nor does he know why he's put on this earth. He gave up a pro-football career for his wife -- but has settled for a mediorce job that doesn't inspire him. He wakes up every morning with a sadness about his life. Obviously it's affected his marriage. He and his wife sleep in separate bedrooms. The opening scene is him returning from a job interview in another city which he is considering moving to. He takes off his wedding ring to flirt with a woman who sits next to him.
It isn't until he meets Samuel L. Jackson, that he begins to realize he may be a hero, put on this planet for a reason. He actually figures this out, and as he embraces "who is really is" (gets a life)his marriage begins to heal.
This is along the theme of men knowing their purpose and task as a necessary component for emotional health/marital health.
The interesting part is that his wife started to cheat on him, largely did so because of his low self-esteeem. He kept beating himself up about his career failures and it turned her off. She ended up hooking up with a strong self-confident, successful man.
This theme repeats itself a lot in men's relationship manuals (Daeda and Cunningham).
Interesting.
I love Heroes too! I do think that's great for men (and women) to work on their self-esteem and confidence, but don't like the idea that a woman cheats merely b/c of a man's low self-esteem. That character, Matt seems like a very loving good man, who was having some career problems. Just doesn't seem enough for a healthy woman to go looking for a confident man. Seems like it's a little bit blaming the victim to me... Karen
