I think I may belong here.

[kelaaron]

If I ever get back on the alt universe, I'll put the pics up from training camp and fan fest. I've got really good ones from about 3 feet away. Any yes, he always sounds angry even when he isn't yelling. I miss Tony Dungy cuz I think he had way more integrity but I just love Gruden's enthusiasm.

No guys we will probably never get it. Yesterday was full of apologies from H for everything, especially dragging me into his confusion. His exact words. As upset as it made me in general, what really got to me was that for the first time in years, I actually felt like he had a clue what he was apologizing for (me hurting), that he actually meant them, and how sad/upset he really is. Oh, here's a funny, Sat night, we were standing next to each other, while he was trying to say something but refused to look me in the eye, I had to look up to see his face (I'm a whole foot shorter than H), when he finished, I said I think I'm shrinking as I seem to be having to tilt my head further to see your face. H said "Well, you are getting old." I kindly reminded him that we both were (I'm only 3 months older than him). So as I have wondered before and have received some confirmation, I think we are just about out of replay and into the depression/withdrawl phase of this thing. I'll tell you, if this is it, this is harder than the other crap.

I am in a much better frame of mind today though. I went to church yesterday, it was healing and message day, and even though I've never been to this one before, I decided to go and meet some friends. So I received a healing, which I needed (no not like you see on TV, where the person is touched and falls over), just some prayers said over you, and I felt lighter. More like having your aura cleaned if that makes sense. And I was one of the few who received a message. I knew I would, my guides had revealed that to me earlier in the day which is why I decided to go, and it was calming, reassuring and nice to hear that things are getting better. It was kinda funny as the spirits described me as the mole in the wack-a-mole game for the last many months, and when I think about how I've felt, that is the perfect way to describe it. But that is ending and things are improving for me. Which is wonderful. It is so nice to recieve confirmation about things that you already feel or suspect. I am working on things that I have put to the wayside for so long and it is nice. Also getting ready to register for the spring semester (boy when I finally graduate, they will have to give me 3 degrees because i get so close and then change majors). So.......