Last night the W text me and called becasue a friend of ours is trying to get a job at my company. I told her when I heard something I would let her know. the w decided she would jump in. She ended the text with a "MWA". I spoke withour frined this morning about thepsition and what is gouing on. I also told her what was up with the text, was it a kiss my ass kinda thing. she said no. the W just text me and said she didn'tr mean anything by it, she tried to recall it because its a habit. I was stupid enought to reply, "Habit? since when." and then a second text" On you mean habit for other people."

Room looks good, it is all me. Her clothes are int he upstairs linen closet and her bvox of clothes are ina spare bedroom. I moveed everything of hers out. My kids are happy i did it. It was emotional for me. Its been about 3 weeks since I had tears or really felt ripped. Last night was very painful.

She made a comment to my son the other night after he told her to go back to me. her reply was " It isn't that easy". He started to argue with her and then backed off. I have to say when I saw thwe MWA at the end of her text in capital letters, I was excited. then to hear tonight that it wasn't meant, it was habit, she tried to recall the message.

I have been in the house all weekend working, yard work, packing upthe last visuals of her in the house so i don't see them and regress. Got a ton of stuff done. Wish I had headed down and gone to the dance, but these things needed getting done and the D and I had a great day just picking up and having dinner together. She wants me to get a girlfriend. she says it isn't right that I don't go out on dates and meet someone. I explained to her my feelings on that. right now I am into getting the projects around my house in hand, looking after her and me and letting everything else evolve as necessary.

Does suck being alone emotionally. Thinking of reading the book again and the book on her midlife crisis. there's nothing new in the books, but it keeps my mind steady. Keeps reminding me that all this crap is not about me or my marriage.

Anyway just posting cause I was feeling low. Although I wonder whether otr not she meant the MWA and my comment to her our friend mayb made her think Ithat I thought it was a sarcastic remark. which I told her I did.