Well its another wonderful day to be alive. The link above is to my last thread and nothing is new and nothing has changed.
My H is a gambling addict that has chosen his life of gambling and hanging out with his pregnant troll to being a father to his 2 kids with me. He called me from the cardroom last night to borrow money and of course she was there with him. I don't know about you, but if I was a week away from delivery, sitting in a cardroom, playing poker all night long wouldn't be my first choice, but then who am I to judge right?
If I sound the least bit angry or bitter, its because I am. I am mad at myself for wanting to believe. I am mad at myself for putting up with things that under any other circumstances I wouldn't have. Love makes you do stupid and desperate things. It makes you blind to the truth, even when others point it out. It makes you able to believe the most outrageous and outlandish things, just so you can get up in the morning and sleep at night.
I'm in a pretty bad place right now and I appreciate all of the help and advice I have received here. Even if I don't always agree with some of what I'm told, I know I have needed to hear it for my own good. Thanks to all of you that have kept up with me and tried to help me, especially when I didn't listen. You all have helped me through one of the darkest times of my life and I am eternally grateful for every comment and piece of advice I have ever gotten. Thanks to all of you. I don't know where I would be without your support.
M:39 H:39 K:S14;D8 T:22yr M:15yrs S:12/28/07 EA/PA 3/14/08 OW preg 11/17/08 born 12/12/08 his ~~~~~~~ Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option
