some things taht i have learned through this are that God is and always truly was my Provider. Even though xh either gives financially now or gave in the past -whatever it was truly GOD that was providing.

Even now - it is so wierd as xh is spuratic with his giving....but it seems as though it is always "enough". Just like God isnt' it? just enough.

Other things..

I can think. I always used to get scared going (driving) places when I hadnt been there before. Sure I would use mapquest or whatever but well I am more visual that way. ANYWAY through this stupid journey i have learned how to read the maps better -- get lost and FIND my way out without calling someone. (ie without calling xh). I can think. I can hang picture and plug in electronics without him. I can hook up a dryer- after getting a new power plug BY myself!

My xh was the decorator... I have learned that I too can decorate and the best part? KNOWONE here to criticize me.

So for now the best thing for me is to see the stupid little things..... people who have been through thsi say later there are BIG things to be thankful for. I dont have very many of those.... but today i think i will focus on thsoe.

M-20 years/BOMB 12/24/06
Moved out 3/12/07
D final 7/30/2008
finding myself again