Quote: How do you feel about love being a choice, a decision, and not a feeling?
I too, have heard ILYBINILWYA....I tell myself it is a choice and that my H still cares for me and what happens to me, but doesn't have that "high" of being in love. Is it okay that I told him I'm not in love with him right now either??
Quote: In what ways have you, and your partner, might have let your love dwindle, and not made your love for each other a priority?
We definitely took each other for granted before our separation. I regret that so much now!!! Things are so clear to me now (hindsight is 20/20!!) and i wish I knew then what I know now. If so, I would have treated my H differently and we probably would still be together or at least working together at saving the M!
Quote: What do you think about NOT talking to him/her about your "feelings" of love for each other? About not putting any pressure on them to talk about it?
We've been S for 9 months today and I stopped saying ILY about when I started DBing (May). I feel like it puts less pressure on him to say it when he doesn't feel it (or at least think he feels it). It is so hard!!!
Quote: What do you think are some of the differences between "being in love" with a person, and "loving" a person?
I think "being in love" is a "high" feeling when you find seomone new or when your S does soemthing that gives you a rush of emotion. Loving someone is so much more--caring, respect, mutual goals, teamwork, etc!! I think when you LOVE the person, you are in it for the long haul--no matter what!!!
Happiness is like a butterfly: the more you chase it, the more it will elude you, but if you turn your attention to other things, it will come and sit softly on your shoulder.... (thoreau)
and I stopped saying ILY about when I started DBing (May). I feel like it puts less pressure on him to say it when he doesn't feel it (or at least think he feels it). It is so hard!!! 
