The Realtionship IQ Quiz: #1- 1. Conflict and anger are signs that your relationship is failing. Tough question...I'd say conflict and anger are normal and are NOT necessarily signs that the relationship is failing. However, the resolution dance that my H and I have participated in for 25 yrs. goes like this: Initially, I become silent and withdrawn...H becomes "invisible." We would go without speaking (unless absolutely necessary) for a day or two and then one of us would "break the ice" by initiating a conversation totally unrelated to the original point of contension between us. My H has never been one to discuss or delve into the "reasons" of why he's unhappy about something or disatisfied etc. I was always the one to probe and take the temperature of our relationship. I tried to draw him out, get him to speak freely about his feelings but he kept them closed up and locked away from me. Over the years I guess I surrendered. I threw up the white marital flag and said to myself, "That's it, I quit, one of us can't make this work by ourselves." So I stopped asking questions, stopped worrying about how he felt etc. THEN, he used that very "silence" that he'd instigated from me as a huge part of his "justification" to cheat. Go figure.
