Thanks guys, glad you liked the post. Wasn't trying to make anybody cry, just trying to give the perspective I have by being older (which I do not consider to be my best quality, but the hairdresser is doing a good job hiding it for me).
Kalni, I agree about the big gesture. In After the Affair by Janis Spring, she talks about a need for the returning spouse to make a big commitment to the marriage, usually something monetary. My H prides himself on not spending money, but I wanted to see some expensive grand gesture that he was in for the long haul -- i.e. an expensive piece of jewelry. This was not happening fast. First he took me to an arts show and bought me some mother of pearl earrings. I acted happy. Then he bought me a silver necklace, but I was still not getting what I wanted. Another month or two, and he bought a very expensive marble table for the house (but he would have taken it in a separation, so I still thought that doesn't count.) And then, finally, for my birthday, six months later, a gorgeous necklace. Not cheap. Gold and diamonds. Really nice. That's when I relaxed. Janis Spring is right. He does need to do that.
