Is this worth saving, or am I only fooling myself?

[Dash]

Hi Goldy, Kat and MC. Thanks for the replies.

MC, I have read a number of your posts on your own thread as well as the threads of others. I admire your strength and fortitude in your situation.

Goldy, it was gorgeous weather here yesterday, but today Mother Nature reminds us of just how fickle she can be. I didn't get a chance to enjoy yesterday much. That seems to be the story of my life and big part of the reason my marriage broke down. I didn't enjoy it while I had it, and now she's off to someone else.

Kat, it is indeed funny how the LBS seems to be the one doing all the work and admitting to all manner of sins. Is this what we do for love? Is it worth it? I know she couldn't come back without some major changes in herself, but I honestly don't see that ever happening. She's a bottler. Keeps everything inside and thinks about nothing on an emotional level. If the cork ever flies, I only hope that someone is there with her to save her from herself.

I am currently reading DR. I haven't gotten very far into the book though, as I'm moving at the same time.

I have to wonder how much space is enough? I don't want her to think I've given up completely do I? I don't know if she would ever swallow her pride enough to even ask me about reconciling if she did have a change of heart.

It seems to my that my wife is going through a very early MLC. She'll be 35 soon and she really doesn't like the idea of getting older. It's always been an issue for her. She's acting as though she's in her mid 20's now without a care in the world. She's given me the standard line of BS about "independence" and what not, and how she's lost herself in our marriage. The thing is, she changes her story more often than I change socks, and I hate dirty socks.

I'm going to see my son on Saturday. Most of the time she ends up spending the entire day with us and inevitably I end up bringing up the R and trying to explain to her what I've learned about myself and what a great guy I'm becoming. Why can't I keep my big trap shut?

Is all the trouble really worth it? I can't count how often I've caught her in lies, but still I'm willing to put myself through this. What is wrong with me? I don't want to hate her, but right now, I don't want to love her either.

How much distance is too much? How detached should I be?

If there are any WAW's reading this, I'd really appreciate your point of view on my situation.

Thanks again for the replies.

Dash