You don't have to apologize to ME -- you're the one who's struggling. We're just trying to help you be more effective. There are those newcomers here who are just experiencing the horrible pain of infidelity for the first time, and know nothing of DB principles nor have they posted much, if at all, yet. Sadly, your husband's done this to you several times before, you've read the book(s) (I believe?), and have posted on here frequently, and gotten much excellent advice (my ramblings notwithstanding ).
I just don't think, for the sake of your OWN emotional health, you can keep pleading ignorance on this stuff, and doing what you KNOW you're not supposed to do, like send a text like that. It's killing the good work you HAVE done.
Put more simply, you are not in a position to let your emotions rule your decision-making any longer.
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