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Feeling better again this morning, but certainly having more odd days of how much this is really p1551ng me off. The sitch, the time, but most of all the boys and what they are going through.


get centered brother...it will pass..

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Originally Posted By: M from Tennessee
Quote:
Feeling better again this morning, but certainly having more odd days of how much this is really p1551ng me off. The sitch, the time, but most of all the boys and what they are going through.


get centered brother...it will pass..



I'm trying bruv, really struggling today, but starting to do things to help myself. Not really helping the old head so a run is in order for this evening I think. I'll be ok when with the boys Sat then out with loads of friends Sat night.

Have gone through the bills and I'm paying £350 ish to STBX for those, throw in the mortgage and I must have MUG written on my forehead !!! Thanksfully it's only been 2 months but still, that is a lot of money to me.

Roll on Sat

Mike - You ever had times when you question whether you quit to soon ? I think I'm having a few days like that, but it's not for her, it's for my boys. The last few times I have seen them S2 is clingy and S6 is just awesome, at that age where we should be doing all the boys stuff I dreamed off together. I don't have a favourite, don't get me wrong, but S6 is very sensitive little guy and always been a mumys boy, but since a few months back we have got closer. I miss him and his brother soooo much it really hurts at the moment.

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Originally Posted By: Arthur
You ever had times when you question whether you quit to soon ? I think I'm having a few days like that, but it's not for her, it's for my boys.
I've had those, but it takes two to Tango and like my W, your W is more interested in doing her thing than saving the M. It is either hang in there and keep getting kicked in the gut hoping something will change, or moving forward for yourself, dropping the rope and leaving the window open for them. What do you do?

Seeing the emotional reactions of the children hurts us the most. My kids aren't comfortable talking to W about how much they hate all of this. They know how I feel and that they can talk to me. My D and your S's being so young they probably don't understand completly why this is happening. They just see it on their terms and you alluded that in an earlier post. S6 is mad because you left the house. He feels like you abandoned him. My D7 is going through the same thing. S2 who really knows what is going on there. Some issues for sure, but they are developing so quickly at that age that he might have fewer scars from all of this. At some point we have to accept we really did all we could and our W's didn't want to try again. Maybe down the road they will, but for now, we and the kids suffer.

Keep your chin up, like you've been doing! Better days are coming.


M42
S12/D9
T17/M12
Bomb 1 3/22/06
Bomb 2 7/11/08
Bomb 3 7/31/08
W Filed 8/1/08
D granted 12/17/08
D Finalized 1/29/09

A man who compromises his principles never had them in the first place.
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Here here guys, that is my W too. It takes 2 to tango and she would rather do her own thing.
LE, well said. I have been having a rough day too and this helped.


Married 6 years
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seperated: 7/15/08
Dbomb: 9/21/08
status: seperated in same home, meeting with mediator moving toward D
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Cheers LE - I know your right, I just sometimes need to be told. I like to journal my thoughts and feelings on here, get it out there and have you guys to tell me what I deep down know.

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Mike - You ever had times when you question whether you quit to soon ? I think I'm having a few days like that, but it's not for her, it's for my boys. The last few times I have seen them S2 is clingy and S6 is just awesome, at that age where we should be doing all the boys stuff I dreamed off together. I don't have a favourite, don't get me wrong, but S6 is very sensitive little guy and always been a mumys boy, but since a few months back we have got closer. I miss him and his brother soooo much it really hurts at the moment.


Yes A, I did. I don't now. Early on I did. Kim never wavered. Once I made the decision to move forward then that's what I did. Once I got there (that decision) then that was my no turning back point. I've actually slightly pushed here recently to get it over with.

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I think I was just having a bad week and thinking my STBX was going out with another man when highly emotional after having the kids.

A good night last night, an early night tonight. Kids all day tomorrow and then a big noght out with loads of friends from a local footy team (yes, the footy where you actually use your feet) which should be a right laugh.

I look forward to Saturday nights far to much which I think also makes the weeks drag

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Quote:
I think I was just having a bad week and thinking my STBX was going out with another man when highly emotional after having the kids.


next time say, "have a great time". You may as well. She's proven she will do it no matter what.

Hey A is "footy" soccer or Rugby??

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Footy is football or soccer to you guys !!!

yeah, I usually do say something like that, Wednesday I was not myself as I mentioned a few posts back. Having those bad days like you found last weekend, but knowing they will come and then go, I can always hold myself together well enough to not react whether I miss an opportunity to really give it the 'as if'. It's not really 'as if' anymore tho, it's real !!!

I always think back to when she was baiting me saying she had a Bf and I replied really nicely hope he makes you happy and your happy etc. Well, a week later that ended so it was all definitely to get at me. Maybe this one will be the same.

I do truely hope she finds happiness in her life. I do not want her to continue with the pain she is feeling tho I do not belive she can do that with some proper long term IC. It certainly won't be by sleeping about or from having another man, she will make the same mistakes again, whereas I know I won't.

Off now, might not be on til Sunday with the weekends and Sat nights stories for you all. Have a gooden folks.... Happy Halloween

Last edited by Arthur; 10/31/08 04:16 PM.
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Originally Posted By: Arthur
It certainly won't be by sleeping about or from having another man, she will make the same mistakes again, whereas I know I won't.
I just wish I could see them in the moment when they realize that! That is what makes this somewhat easier to digest. I know my head is on straight, just sad I can't help someone I care about see how hers is twisted about.

Enjoy your weekend!

LE


M42
S12/D9
T17/M12
Bomb 1 3/22/06
Bomb 2 7/11/08
Bomb 3 7/31/08
W Filed 8/1/08
D granted 12/17/08
D Finalized 1/29/09

A man who compromises his principles never had them in the first place.
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