Hey Jeff... advice I have heard on these things is, you can only really talk about yourself, your feelings and how you see it. So, (sorry beginnersmind!).. I dont thikn you could say "We have not been happy in this marriage for a long time".
I'd express concern for her though, if you dont think she may be happy/fulfilled and that you would like her to talk to you about that, as she is your W of over 20 years and you have raised 4 sons!?
Its tricky, as you have already gone to Retrovaille and ended up back here again. Whose idea was it to go to that by the way?
Ali x
Me:40! H:37 Together: 12yrs IDLY & left 11/07 ADs 03/08 OW 8/08 Reconciled 05/09 now married! my thread