Well, it's time for me to face some hard truths. I got my wife's proposal for a separation agreement. The vile lies throughout. I've caused her lots of pain, clearly. I can see how what I did was right from my point of view and all so wrong from hers.
I decided to first write my responses. No a debt in our state can't be pushed to another for that reason, or that one, or... (you get the picture). I found that when I was done, that the law was going to clearly come down on my side and hurt her even more. I wish we could stop talking through the lawyers and deal more directly. I suspect I made promises that she should remind me of, and visa versa.
Next I decided that self-pity, self-recrimination, and moping about wasn't going to save our wonderful marriage. It was time for a gamble on a 180. I've decided to agree with every term but one, the dissolution. She gets all of the property. I get the debts. She get control. I go to therapy. I liquidate my business. I cash out my IRAs. I pay off the debts with the proceeds and make payments (25% of my take-home income) to retire what I don't. She agrees to cohabitation and no D for 24 months. I called it a Reconciliation Agreement. I worked hard to give her everything she wants and the one thing I want, her continued love.
