Maybe you should go throught the process of the funeral if that is what you need to do to go dark...and I mean dark, no hallway light left on,on her.
The stuff with D11 can be hard but she knows who the messed up parent is. She is "escaping" with her friends when she is with her Mom. They are her support group, just like we are for you. Try not to take it so hard. You know all 3 of them love you. Just stay available and let them know how much you love them back and it will all be good.
I wish you weren't so scared of being alone. We need to do something again, like when we saw Ironman. Don't fill up your calender too full ok? Hugs
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
