New Me - Will WAW ever notice?

[Kakatal]

Locked my old thread. This one will be filled with more positives than negatives! Thanks again to those who have been helping me along the way. Couldn't have made the progress & insights I have undergone without your help!

W drove me & kids to pick out new costumes. Took family out to dinner. Small chit chat with w. Doing my best to make eye contact, validate her feelings if she brings up something, shared funny things kids had done. Light & simple. W got a phone call during dinner - custom ring tone. Went outside to make a call. Came in with story about her mom needing a ride. I realize she is probably lying but just shrug it off & go on with eating. She continues to lie about OM to me but I am no longer paying any credence to it - figure it is her way of trying to cope with the situation.

Dropped me & kids off. On her way out I asked if she was still interested in going to my IC session as she has expressed interest a few weeks ago. She said she was. I said that I realize next week she will probably be working & with no idea what her schedule will be she may want to come on Wed. She said she would think about it & get back to me. Standard reply which I have come to understand means no. I only bring things up once & then let her follow up if she wants to - not going to pressure her to do anything.

W showed up 30 mins late to pick up kids this morning. Didn't say a word to her about being late. Kids ran out to her car, she loaded them up. D2 was crying & she asked why. Explained she didn't want to get out of bed & didn't participate in getting dressed - chuckled a bit with her over that. Said I would be home at 6:30 if she would bring kids by then so I could visit for a couple hours. I have to get up at 4am to catch a flight so w is going to keep kids overnight tonight. She said she would talk to me before then. Not expecting any communication from her. Just smiled & drove away.

Sitch is much easier to deal with when you drop your expectations & just be yourself. You need to go through the period of self-reflection to figure out what you did to contribute to the issues in the m & then commit to make changes. Once you figure out that those changes have to be made without expectations attached, life gets easier to deal with. Best advice I can give out to all the newbies here :-)