Well gee, he bugs you to get a job, you get a job . Now he is finding even more to complain about. He should be excited that it is a little extra income. What did he think was going to happen??? What a big baby!!!
kat
I know!!! There's always gotta be something for him to be mad at me for! Some people I guess you can never satisfy. You know, he's had dreams that my job was going to save our financial sitch and now I guess he's realizing $80 a week he spends way more than that on fast food and vacations I'm sure!!!
Are your L's able to obtain financial info from stbxh that will document his spending on vacations, gifts, and other non-essentials?
I don't know. She's getting his credit card & bank statements for the past year and he's put everything on credit card, almost half of our bills I think and a new bathtub, etc. When he went on vacation he would use card for gas and that's it so probably paid $$$ for the hotels or used OW's card and he reimbursed her or something like that b/c she's already divorced.
My L was thinking he might have a secret account somewhere, but honestly I think he's spent extra money on hotel rooms, vacations, dinner out and that kind of stuff and we also have double bills now that he's moved out. I don't think he's really limited his spending at all, just told me a couple times I would be totally broke after the D and he would have a lot more money. But with all the credit card expenses I don't see how that can be true! I think he's a little delusional.
I know he is also in denial about our kids. They're autistic spectrum and dyslexic and he says my homeschooling should have cured them by now so they should be fine in public school (at this point you can't cure those and homeschooling is a good schooling method but no magical cures). My S14 was in 2 years of a nice private school with only 10 kids in it, and I wound up homeschooling him after school b/c he couldn't learn for some reason and crying/sick all the time too, so eventually just did it full-time.
I just emailed H asking him to have the kids as late as possible Saturday so I can be a ghost at the Haunted theatre tour again. They're going to have ghostrackers and everything. He picks them up Fri. night and drops them off Saturday. He says he can only have them until around 9 (guess he's got a hot date). I can't believe this guy is asking for primary custody--like he has time!!! Karen
Thanks y'all. I think I'm going to enjoy it. And a nice break from my life working at a job. Will be less stressful than the rest of my life I think/hope.
Took the kids to the C today. Told the C that I'm worried S14 is depressed. He's been talking badly about himself and focusing on that and just seems a little glum or numb or something (reminds me a little of me last year when I was depressed). She said she's going to keep an eye on him, and I will too of course. I guess it's a tough age, and having a disconnected dad and the D and everything is rough.
I saw the C today also. She's usually really supportive of what I'm doing b/c I'm generally doing good, but she was ragging on me about not being assertive enough about the broken heater situation. Well, H doesn't want to pay the $5000 or more to replace the heater, and he's run up all the credit cards at this point, 3 maxed out cards. She also thinks I should be more assertive with the attorney, and you know how she is. She kind of bosses everyone around, and if I had an issue that really bothered me, I would stand up, but if I don't really care I just do whatever she advises.
I also told her I was peeved that H's L was asking my L about when I would get a job and she said she thought that was a valid question, I guess b/c it has taken me a while. I said well I've applied to about 2 dozen jobs in the past few months, and I think the 9-year gap on my resume probably made people question about hiring me. I know from working in this area you usually get 100 or more applications per job, so a gap in the past 9 years would probably make me think I was questionable too if I was looking at my resume! My point about the L's comment was that I've applied to lots of jobs, all the part-time jobs within 30 miles of my house, done well on the interviews I had, and if people don't hire me I can't really tell him as to what date I'll get a job. I mean I guess she can tell him now I've got a temporary job, but if I hadn't gotten it it could be anywhere from a day as it turned out to a few months more I would think. Duh!
Anyway, just kind of felt it was not that great a session for me. Kind of thinking maybe I won't need it much longer maybe. I feel pretty good right now, despite my C's concerns. Kind of feel like it's not as important to me as when I first went when I would count down the hours and minutes to my next C session. Karen
