I guess it's over

[Trixi]

The mammogram from last week'ish had some areas of concern, so they had me back yesterday to redo on a better machine; same areas of concern, so they had me do ultrasound, they determined that the areas of concerns were cysts with the exception of one area that they want to biopsy. I am a tad more worried than I would like to be because 2 years ago I went to the doc and said "This area just feels 'funny' to me" and while he couldn't feel anything, he did order a mammogram, and because there was nothing specific, the radiologist said "no" because I wasn't 40 yet. There better not be anything wrong- I will be so ticked if there is.

Tonight the 4 of us go out to celebrate my daughter's 21st. Last night she called up at 1am to say "I'm 21; thanks for having me be born; I love you." So that was funny. (She was obviously with friends having a very good time.)

Yes, but what you haven't shown him is that he has to fight for you. Well, actually, he doesn't, which makes me very sad.

Indeed.
Nothing much I can say, really, since you're right.
I am too empathetic to his side of things; I can understand feeling confused and wanting some time to work stuff out without the additional pressure of someone wanting something from you. (for instance, like my xbf.) Speaking of which, xbf sent me a very long text apologizing for being insensitive and boorish and for assuming that we would just fall back into each other's arms after all these years. The parallel being that I feel like *I* need time to work some things out on my own, and if I let xbf into my life, it would influence me in a way I don't want, and make demands of me that I don't need.

I have a lot to think about.