Trying2Live-Post #3

[AllW8SBF]

Good Morning Ladies,
Well Marisol you give me a flutter of hope that I can do this. Hope I can completely get where your coming from and you at least did better than I when I broke.
Today is the day we all look in the mirror and tell our selves.

I'm going to retrain my brain to focus on the positive, not the negative.

I am STRONG and can handle whatever life throws my way - Hey you girls have gone through child birth, these men can't handle a bump without running for cover.

I choose to love and appreciate myself - yes it's a choice, you want to waddle in his crap or choose to treat yourself like you deserve!

I can make healthy choices. - In people, food, activities.

And here is the big one - I FORGIVE my flaws and celebrate my STRENGTHS. I mean for peat sakes we are willing to forgive these men for their WRONGS but what about us, we get down on ourselves for failing our daughters, ourselves, our marriage. We are human and we have a moment of weakness, we just need to say ok I'm sorry I did that to myself I'm going to make up for it and start the next moment positively.


OK so maybe I can say that because yesterday was a somewhat pleasant day for me. I got a Halloween costume - Red Riding Hood. I'm going to a hockey game with H on Friday and told him I'm dressing up and then I didn't know this till yesterday but Saturday I have plans - I'm going to a Halloween party with my sister and her friends so I have another reason to dress up.
And I did my thing yesterday, he did his, afterwards he came down to talk to me about what's going on with him.
OK get this, remember T2L you said to change the subject when he talks about OW - well you also know he's trying to find OW, he's got personal ads out. Well he says to me hypothetically, he has a friend who had called a Woman who it took a week for her to call him back, and she apologized and they could schedule something this weekend. She said we'll probably talk sometime between Last Friday and this Saturday and we'll figure out what to do then. Well hasn't heard from her, so this "friend" called this woman and left a message about setting up this weekend. Well H wanted to know what he should tell his "friend" to do if she doesn't call. How long he should would for the call? and that stuff.
Once again he needs me to talk to about this stuff. He just starts talking and tells me everything. What is with this guy?

Well he said his "friend" is a little upset that he may waste a Saturday because this woman hasn't called. And I'm thinking all this time...ahhhh that's too bad, I'll be busy

Hey can I ask, can we use this forum to rant about what their doing even though at least I'm going to have the mind set that I'm GAL and just need a place to unload this crap they spew so it's out of us, not poisoning our system of goodness to ourselves? Does that make sense?

Oh can some one pm me/ email me whatever the link to this thread you were talking about LRT? And T2L what was that info you were talking about nature...? I don't think I saw that, and I'd be interested in it.

T2L your right I don't want him to think I'm moving on, but it's the balance of him not thinking I'm doing this for him. But I guess it's getting it through that it's for me - not him, AND not for Anyone else. And then also it's hard because he asks me all sorts of questions, and he talks to me ALL the time, so changing the subject, or walking away doesn't work very well. And I'm afraid to use your "Your funny" walk away technique because I feel like he's going to think that well he's crazy, I'm diminishing he thoughts or actions. Which that's one of the problems I'm trying to avoid, him thinking I'm just avoiding - cause that is what I do and one of his problems with me.
And I the mistake of letting him think i'm moving on cause I through a hypothetical question at him like he did me, and said well what's too soon to return a call after the first call. So he said oh someone met someone at the bar. And I let him believe that. ARGHHHH! Bad idea. But he should know I'd never just go find someone, it takes time to get over, and I'd talk to someone just to get to be friends with more people.

Thanks, off to do some work.