The future talk was more of a hypothetical if we ever moved to this country that we aren't even talking about moving to, but I liked that he brought it up anyway...
Honestly we were pretty drunk last night. We split a bottle of wine at dinner, then had 2 additional glasses. We went on to have 2 more drinks at the hotel bar. Thing is that I remember the entire night clearly, and he wasn't acting out of character or anything. It does mean that it gives him an out though in terms of me "expecting" more of the same kind of behavior.
Today was pretty nice, though not as amazing. We went to breakfast where we each just read the paper. Most of the other couples were doing the same thing, but I still am a bit paranoid that H will think this is "not enough". In fact it was hard for me not to feel like this about a lot of today. In the car we listened to historical lectures on the iPod that we both really like, so we didn't talk much, but to me this was fine. Not sure how he feels. Every interaction we DID have seemed nice and comfortable, and there was joking around etc. We got back to the house and he had to leave within 20 minutes to meet a friend in town. There was minimal conversation in the house, but ran to the store, and gave him a quick hug and peck on the lips before leaving in case I didn't see him before he left again. He seemed OK with this, but it was more me testing the waters. I won't initiate again in any case. I got back and he was still home, was nice when he left etc. I mean it honestly feels as though everything has shifted for the better. Every interaction we have had has been really nice, and going on a trip together made it feel as though we were together again.
On this trip we went through a lot of situations that would have caused fighting or bickering in the past, but didn't this time. I was on my best behavior, but in a genuine way. I did not try to give directions when he was driving, made sure to try and let him take charge when ordering wine etc., and did not rush him to leave the hotel room even when it meant sitting around for a few hours when I really wanted to go out.
So I'm at home now, and H will probably get back fairly late tonight. I think this is a good thing, that he is going to hang out with a friend for a bit. I just truly hope that things are as they seem to me, in terms of moving back toward us being together. H is going on a business trip for 3 nights starting tomorrow, so unless something comes up on IM or when he gets back tonight/before work in the morning, it's unlikely there will be an R talk before Friday. I am fine with this, but if he has anything positive to say, I would definitely love to hear it!
ITH
Me:34 H:36 M:5 years T: 8 years Bomb: 07/17/08 I want to be separated for 6 months--I don't know what I want the outcome to be S 07/28/08-11/08/08 Living together ~7 months D Possibly busted?!?!!!
