BUT what about the kids missing rec time with him. I shake my head. I try to protect them from the hurt this inflicts and from the wrong messages he is sending them. Am i wrong. Should i say nothing to either party ?
You can say something. Say what you see. I think the kids would have liked to spend time with you. I think Joe was hoping to hang out with you. Mary had an interesting homework project, did you see it?
Note: NOT: You need to be here for the kids. Not: You are irresponsible. Not: You aren't being a father. ...or anything else provocative or argumentative. Definitely not: [b] you haven't been a father for the past THREE MONTHS![b] or any remark that expands the issue beyond the basic "your kids like to spend time with you."
You can also say to the kids - if you want to spend time with him, maybe you could tell him. he's been busy, maybe he doesn't know you want to spend time with him.
