Found last week a tough week for some reason. Maybe as it started with the mediation on Monday and set in some real reality.
Have asked STBX to speak to her sols today as I do not think I should still be paying all the bills. Mortgage until this is sorted is fair enough, but bills no. She is having her cake and time for no more. I've also decided I have to get out by Feb 09 from my parents, it's really starting to bug me being there and is not healthy for me. I am not comfortable, I'm getting down stuck in a room and I need to see a light at the end of the tunnel at least. I'm contemplating just going to rent a room for a month before getting place, but really not sure.
So, I've decided I really need to start making plans and a to do list as I am standard bloke and not organised at all so put things off all the time. Got to change that. Got my big poker tournament Tues and hopefully Weds night this week and a big night out Sat so nice busy week. Will try and get running tonight but have the boys til 7pm so bit tight for time.
Oh, the thing that has been making it worse is how clingy my S2 is getting. He was ok til last week then really clingy Thursday and Saturday wanted loads of cuddles. It's really nice in one respect but makes me so sad to see it. I know S6 is also not 100% as when he came home Weds night from Cinema, he asked if I was staying there as it was gone 8pm and when I said no, he was all sad. Hate seeing them go through this, breaks my heart.
I'm just so missing them at the moment and so desperate to get a place so they can stay over and have their toys there etc.
