So today the girls and I and D17's boyfriend went for a little day trip followed by going to our familys favorite restaurant in L.A., all part of "Hanging with dad for his birthday"
We haven't been to that restaurant since W was still living here in april, and W and I were 'pretending' nothing was wrong - for the kids sake.
We've gone to that restaurant since W and I were dating, and they know us there even though we only would go once every few months.
Of course, one of the waitresses asked where W was, and I said "She had other plans".
During dinner, the girls were talking to D17's boyfriend about some of the things we've had happen during dinners at this place. Lot's of "Remember when mom..." and other stuff.
They are over this. I'm the only one who hasn't healed.
I had to excuse myself to go to the bathroom twice so I could cry. Then in the middle of dinner W called D17, who told her where we were and W must have asked her if we were doing presents because she said "no just dinner".
Why does she care?
On the way home it was night, which was good because for the 1/2 hour I just was tearful and hurting.
I hate what has happened to my life. I'm usually strong but today was a disaster. My birthday is Wednesday and I'm turning 50 and I didn't mean for my life to turn out this way.
