Just transplanting my goals and action plan over from my old thread to here, where I can get to them quicker.
New Goals, July 18, 2003
What I want:
1. To get my health back. 2. To gain weight. 3. To feel safe and secure. 4. To have my H feel comfortable, at ease, and happier here with me. 5. To save my M.
What can I do to accomplish these things.
1. Be more positive, think more positively, act more positively. a. Smile more. b. Lovingly detach. c. Give H space. d. Give this situation time. e. Be patient. f. Do not pursue. g. Show more sexual interest even if it means initiating it. h. Validate H’s feelings and needs. i. Make the most of our time together. j. Keep educating myself. k. Be careful about doing things that will only end up causing me more pain.
2. Visualize 3. Reinforce those things that H does that are positives. 4. Minimize those things that H does that aren’t positives. 5. Show more confidence in myself and in us. 6. Practice staying in the here and now. 7. Practice keeping negative thoughts at bay. (Clearing cobwebs) 8. Reach out to others for help and to give help. 9. Allow H to come to me on his own, in his own way, in his own time. 10. Forgive myself when I fail to live up to this list and know that setbacks are part of the process.
