I'm not sitting on the fence, I only got proof on Friday...

I am trying to figure out the best course, and to think 2-3 steps ahead.

I want to clip her relationship w/this OM, but the questions then come up on do I kick her out or not? And what about the other (single OMs) she has out of state? And... Is there a way to do this without our R going so toxic that reconcilliation is a pipe dream?