Bottom line though, if you pull back from him more it might help him realize that he may lose you and motivate him towards your R. Have you considered going dark on him more? Does he know that other men may be interested in you and that you don't "need" him anymore?
He does know that some guys are sort of around, but I think I made a strategic error. He was saying that he sometimes thinks we "just aren't right for each other' but other times..."and I hopped in with "well, chemistry isn't something that is super easy to find. I mean, I have a few guys that are interested and I am like "meh" because there isn't that certain "je ne sais quois"." He does know that there was the guy that fixed my mower and he said something to the effect of putting my feminine wiles to work. {eye roll-that was NOT what I was doing, but whatever.}
Oh, he was wearing a shirt from a LONG time ago and he says "Look I still have this shirt; I haven't worn it for such a long time. And that girl was totally flirting with me and you didn't do anything about it!You just stood idley by." (I do not have a strong recollection of this incident. Sorta vaguely. maybe. This would be back when I was thyroid impaired.) I asked if he would have liked it if I would have said "back off, beyotch" and he said that he would have because it would have been appropriate; but then I got all po'd on the Costa rica trip when he was talking with [gal] and there was nothing there. IOW, I got mad at an inappropriate time and not when I should have. *sigh* I just said "well, I'm not perfect." He mentioned the girl flirting with him more than once and me not "doing" anything about it. I am not sure exactly what he was looking for--was he wanting to know I loved him enough to fight for him? Or that I was confident enough to take on another woman? Okay, I 'get' that I didn't do something he needed back then, but cheeze-us, Mary and Joseph, haven't I shown that I would fight for him now??
I did agree that it IS probably best I am not at the house right now.
Sucked right back in. You know, based on his question "can you keep renting?"; offering to figure out a way to make sure I can buy this house; stating that it will be a good rental (especially since there will be rental duplexes right next to me); saying he just needs more time; clarifying that having his son and young roommate are only temporary things; his past statements that we can always remarry later if we got a divorce...it seems like he knows in his heart of hearts we'll eventually be back together, but he can't make that promise right now. OR he is the KING of string-along-land.
Reading it, it seems obvious he's great at stringing me along. But if you saw us in person, you would see that he really seems sincere.
Me-43 H-46 M 12 yrs 7/09 T 15 2 grown kids bomb 7/05/07 H moved out 8/04/07 11/22/09 told him I quit;let's get ball rolling Mid Dec- he isn't sure he wants D End 2/2010-Starting to consider piecing
