thanks for your thoughts. kalni, good point!! ali, I'm really glad my thoughts helped a little bit. I'll be doing my recital november 16th, so there is still potential for it to be a big pluto day! when you talk about pluto it completely sounds like the work I"ve been doing on my heart all year. New York is the center of the arts world in the US, and almost all the people I"m excited to study with are there... it is just so intense, and I just don't feel prepared technically/artistically/ financially/ mentally, unless maybe I was in school, where I would be sort of protected from the crazy competitiveness.
I think the bigger question is, I do not know where I should go to reach my full potential. I do not know where I belong!!
One of my big realizations these past weeks is there are parts of me that have really atrophied from being in grad school and even from before that, that I want to nurture again. I think that might even be one of my big developmental tasks before reconciliation can occur. But that is more about cultivating a place in my own heart, than needing to be in a specific geographical place.
I feel like I should give B a call soon to ask about the cello, I am just wondering how long I have to wait so I don't seem overeager, since I emailed him back on thursday and haven't heard from him. So the ball is in his court. Maybe wait a week? I dunno.
