H told me he is having some sort of 'family event' tomorrow...all people I know, are going with their families... and H and ow will be there with our kids.
Not liking that.
I am having dinner with some of those friends in a few hours and nobody has told me about it.
Yuk. Don't feel much like the dinner party anymore...
Love Cinders xxx
"In the depths of my winter, I realized there is within me an invincible summer" Albert Camus
Cinders, I would take what he says with a grain of salt. He may or may not be going to an event with those friends. Also, he saying he has food at home to eat and can't stay for pizza....may or may not be the ow pushing and pulling his strings. He may be going through a period of "shock at himself", i.e., he found out that he liked your company, liked the family unit as a whole and scared himself silly into running back to the ow. I've seen a lot of them do this and use very poor excuses, just like the one about the food, to keep their distance.
Please do not allow his comments to get to you. It's tough, but I really wouldn't give his comments much thought these days. He's just digging at you to make you feel left out and him trying to show you that he's moved on.
Enjoy your dinner with your friends.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
I know for sure that he's going tomorrow though...it's an important person to him business wise and they are very wealthy... H is attracted to that no matter how much he says he's not. I did think about 'shock at himself' and him saying those things because he felt we were getting too close again. Like you say Snodderly, I shouldn't let it bother me.
Kelaaron...not sure IF she's pushing him, just a feeling.. thanks for dropping by !
What I dislike right now, is that people have accepted H and ow as a couple and just live with the fact, without saying anything about it to them or amongst themselves..it's been 2 years now and people are now used to that new couple...that's life.
Last edited by Cinderellaman; 10/25/0801:04 PM.
Love Cinders xxx
"In the depths of my winter, I realized there is within me an invincible summer" Albert Camus
I know exactly how you feel. All of our friends AND my children have now accepted them as a couple with the exception of a few that have always been closer to me than him and weren't big fans of OW before.
It bothers me but I keep telling myself that the world today does not see the situation the same as I do. They accept that a couple is over as soon as they separate and do not feel it is wrong to become involve before the divorce is final. Heck a lot of them don't see anything wrong with OW being our friend and then going after my H. The moral barometer has changed drastically over the years.
Everything happens for a reason, maybe Dad needs to find that it isn't better out there, he needs to realize how good he had it here. Maybe he will find God and that is the most important thing when he finds Him he will know he is supposed to come home.
What a shame people nowadays have no moral compass.
I think that your Husband's basically pushed the OW on friends and family and the friends are forced to accept the situation as a means of being polite.
But don't think for a minute that they aren't the topic of conversation and gossip.
Nobody respects the choices that they made, especially when children are involved.
And Cinders, because of your Husband's business relationships, nobody is going to say a word about your Husband's immorality. Business is business.
My Husband was the topic of many a conversation, people thought he was a ridiculous fool, but to his face they acted as though he was just wonderful.
One day they will feel ashamed and embarassed by their bad choices.
Wishing you a truly blessed and wonderful weekend.
((((((hugs)))))))
There can be no testimony without a test. I am praying to go through this test and come out the other end with a new and better marriage then before.
What I dislike right now, is that people have accepted H and ow as a couple and just live with the fact, without saying anything about it to them or amongst themselves..it's been 2 years now and people are now used to that new couple...that's life.
You know, our friends did the same. And when I stayed with H they never mentioned or asked anything about our sitch. They just carried on with me as if nothing had happened. I know for a fact that they accepted OW almost immediately. Oh well, it is all in the past.
One day they will feel ashamed and embarassed by their bad choices.
Weird, but I hope one day he will feel that, then again, I do realize that may never happen as he may just keep himself distracted from it... But thanks, it did make me feel better to think it MAY happen ! Thanks for the hugs, they did me good today...some days we need hugs don't we?!
Truelove, true...it is all in the past as you said...I wish you a great Sunday.
I just got back from dinner with friends. It was at a friend's house...she and her husband were hosts and two other friends with their husbands were there. Everyone was sweet to me, but it was hard, being there with only couples....conversations felt restricted...and coming home alone once again, was hard. H and I used to love those evenings out, and I would spend most of the night admiring all he had to say...I would make some jokes and he would hug or kiss me in passing by...
Oh well, I'm off to bed now. Dreaming of a new future.
Love Cinders xxx
"In the depths of my winter, I realized there is within me an invincible summer" Albert Camus
seems as if ow is putting pressure on him. She probably didn't like what happened last night
PROBABLY?
Cinders you are *so* naive. Of course she didn’t like it. She was most likely bubbling over with venom when he got in.
No wonder he doesn’t want Pizza!! - the poor man probably had a severe case of indigestion bought on by his homecoming interrogation from OW.
As if that isn’t bad enough . . . . it sounds like she has even gone out shopping and filled the house with food to make it more like your home … all she has to do now is learn how to cook it ……..
Happy days indeed.
Nutty x
Be The Greener Grass.
Me 40 H 42 Son 11 Married 15 years. Left May 2006 after gambling spree I had EA August 2006 OW Aug 07 after another gambling spree (she will make me happy - stop me gambling!) I filed for divorce 9th April 2008.
