I am so sorry you had a frustrating day!! What jumps out at me about H "working on it"... I can see how it seems like what he is doing is inadequate. But it is possible that he is doing a lot of work, ON HIS OWN, on HIMSELF. In which case, if he does decide to come back and be a full time dad and a full time husband in a full time relationship, he will be in WAY better shape to deliver the goods.
I just know, I couldn't have figured out most of what I learned, or grown the ways I've grown this past year, if I didn't have a cr@pload of time by myself, away from my B. I know it's got to be completely different when you're a parent and you need your co-parent. But I just wanted to throw out that possibility.
Please be kind to yourself... it was not your fault that you didn't have the tools you needed!!!!
Are you thinking about going for a different position where you could be part of a team?
When is your birthday?
can I tell you a secret? on my birthday in september, I was EXTREMELY depressed. in many ways it was one of the worst days I"ve ever had. but now it is a couple months later and coincidentally I am feeling some crazy real joyfulness. so I just wanted to say, beautiful where, even if you have a not-so-good birthday, you could have many beautiful juicy non-birthdays afterwards.
