Tgone, I couldn't agree more. My feeling, my instinct tells me this is salvageable and as i stated above, the harder a line I holder, the tougher I stand, the more response I see. I believe my early on, be happy go lucky around her, try to win her back by showing her I'm a nice guy was crap. what she saw was a doormat. Not anymore. she sees anger and defiance. she sees the pain I have felt and am feeling. Oh yeah, I was told her crash will be monumental. I have been told it will make my pain and suffering pale in comparison, those words exactly. I do not wish this on her, but now I fully understand the extent of the situation. It has nothing to do with my marriage, relationship me or my kids, it is her. I had read it over and over again. Been told that over and over again. I spent a lot of time trying to see things her way, couldn't do it. She had told me before this that she was going through something and for me not to worry. I was told by my therapist that she probably was hoping everything would pass, which is not ucommon. Unfortunatley or weekend drama and the emotional affair with the OM were enough to push her out the door. My chasing didn't help. But now, as you indicated and others have guided me, she wants what she can't have, she speaks and lives in a world that doesn't exist. By being the way I am towards her right now, I am showing her that I will not tolerate it. She is seeing rejection. that is what I have learned. that my rejection will show her that I am not going to sit by idly while she runs through wonderland. I do feel better about myself, I have to hoestly say I do. It hurts to do it, but tough love. I have heard it from this board, my therapist, the chuch and the like. I have not ever held a hard line with her. I think because I was an emotional retard. Not anymore. You have a great weekend with your lady firiend. I am going to have a couple of glasses of wine this weekend. Not falling off the wagon, just in the mood.
