Karlah - Grief, sadness and loss make us all feel needy. Its natural. Grieving is a process that can't be rushed. I remember feeling so low, so utterly devastated and incredibly needy when my ExW left without a reason. But when I found out she was having an affair those feelings were added to with despair and betrayal. My entire adult life was spent with this one special person and now she is gone. I'll never forget the loss but I will heal and go on which is proof that I don't need her. You can't forget 30 years of memories, love and sharing. But you can create more memories and fill your time with positive people places and activities. Again it is a process.
I think the WAS,MLCers and LBSs are all growing, just going about it under different circumstances and in different ways. I wished so much that my ExW would have stayed in the marriage and been able to sort out her pain. But she couldn't. So we both have to learn the hard way and with alot of pain. The serenity prayer comes to mind.
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He does usually add a disclaimer though. That is that his methods don't necessarily work with emotionally challenged people! There are no steadfast rules with folks who suffer from childhood issues, depression etc. They have to figure things out for themselves and assign value to the people in their lives. We are sometimes just left to sort through the ashes and find the good that is there and always was.
Last edited by sgctxok; 10/27/0809:21 PM.
Me- 47 W- 45 Married 22 years Together 30 years No Kids, 1 dog, 1 Cat 2005 - 2007 W in MLT 1/08 - Crisis hits 3/08 W drops Bomb and leaves in the middle of the night. Admits to PA 4/08 W files for divorce 8/08 Divorce final
