WAW Won't Communicate At All

[cotoffgard]

Yes, I sent my letter via email (which is the only vehicle of communication I have with her...I think). No response thus far, but I have faith that she has read it. Perhaps I've planted seeds of doubt, and it's only a matter of time before the sprout breaks through the surface of the soil.

Others have told me not to have any expectations, and that's what I'm trying fiendishly to do. Some days I'm successful at it, other days I want to put my fists through the wall. Trick is to understand that this apology letter is actually more for your peace of mind than hers, so if she never responds to your apology, then no sweat...you did what you did for you.

I've been in a standstill for about a month after I filed my response to her initial D filing. I guess no news is good news for me, but in some sick way I envy you a bit since you'll at least get to physically be in the same room as you W during the hearing. If roles were reversed, at the hearing, I'd put on an Oscar-worthy performance and act "as if", radiate PMA as much as I can without being transparently fake, smile throughout the meeting. I'd do it just to shake her up and any of her preconceived notions of how this D is affecting me. Gotta keep her guessing...be mysterious, y'know?

Use every face-to-face opportunity you have to DB your friggin' @ss off! Let's face it, DB & DR was designed to be most successful for couples who are on the verge of S or D where there's daily interactions to DB effectively. For people like us, DB & DR only increases our odds (marginally) at busting the D. However, the books have helped me tremendously in many other ways (understanding, diagnosing, coping, GAL'ing, etc.) that I am not in the least deterred from my efforts.

Don't give up hope! I haven't. Divorce is just a formality, but in no way, shape or form is it finality.