I wish I had the answer for you, LL. I struggle with the same feelings.
I hate for people to tell me how strong I am. I don't FEEL strong. I FEEL weak and stupid and just a plain idiot. Those feelings are getting stronger as time goes by. I find myself thinking that I have to do something to boost my self-esteem.
The only thing keeping me sane right now are my kids. My youngest S (17) put his arms around me the other night and told me how much he loved me; how "strong" he thought I was, that I am what holds our family together; and that he knows how hard it was for me and continues to be, but that he really appreciates everything I've done to keep us together.
That made a huge impact on me as a mother, but as for as being a woman/wife/lover, I still feel like a fool.
And I don't know how to deal with that!! How do I combine the two?
